You know what? I hate Blog-hoppers. I seriously hate them. They surf from one blog to another blog, even if they dont know that person. If you're one of them, do hit the Alt and F4 button now. This is an official warning and an outright disclaimer. But if you still choose to stay, well i cant do anything can i?

What is it about height anyway? I dont see why it is a plus point at all. Sure, it helps u take stuffs from high shelves. Sure, the air u breathe is fresher. But aesthetics is all about proportion, not height. Perhaps u guys havent heard about the cavemen story on how height became an important factor for beauty nowadays. Maybe I should enlighten you? Indeed, I shall. For those of you who have read this before, please read it again because obviously u dont get the point.

Once upon a time very very long ago, the earth was only populated by Cavepeople and perhaps some sabertooth tigers. The Cavepeople were divided into groups by their height, becuase the taller ones are usually the stronger and more successful. The tall cavepeople are leaders because it is more possible for them to find food as they are the ones who can reach higher up the trees for fruits, and go deeper into the rivers to catch fish. Not unexpectedly, they run faster too (longer legs, longer strides), thus they dont get killed by the said sabertooth tigers.

The leaders of the pack, aka the Tall Cavepeople, decided one day that Tall is good, Tall is beautiful, Tall is everything nice. Being tall cavemen, they wanted tall cavewomen too, so that the cavewomen dun look so stubbed (I dun think there is such a word, but heck.) standing beside them. Besides this, tall cavewomen cannot claim that they are too short to wash clothes in the river without being washed away. The cavemen liked this point! So they started to make Tall Cavebabies by only letting the Tallest Caveman and Tallest Cavewomen have sex. And boy did they have sex! They "oooh!" and "ahhh!" all day long in the day, mating and mating.

Slowly, the Short Cavepeople foresaw what is going to happen to them. You see, God was fair and mighty in those days, and he made the short cavepeople smarter instead of taller and stronger. The Short cavepeople knew that with more Tall Cavepeople, they would be kicked out of the gang to become outcasts pretty soon, and be bullied more. The Short Cavepeople were totally against the idea of the fruit of Tallest Caveman and Tallest Cavewoman's labour. And they were short. So they cant do much about it, except whine the whole day and give the Tallest Caveman and Tallest Cavewoman a kick whenever they passed by that eventful cave. Not that the Tallest Caveman and Tallest Cavewoman noticed of course.

The Average-height Cavepeople were pissed with all the pandemonium. In fact, they were pissed with almost everything. They were the only type of people God seems to be unfair to. God gave them half brains and half height. In fact, the Average-height Cavepeople were so pissed with the constant moaning of the Tallest Caveman and Tallest Cavewoman, and the constant whining of the Short Cavepeople, that they cant take it any longer. They took out a parang (a kinda knife their kind invented) and slaugthered the shit outta Tallest Caveman and Tallest Cavewoman.

It may be interesting to note that Tallest Cavewoman was killed exactly when she got her first orgasm, also marking the first pre-historic orgasm ever (She was 13 and stood at 1.87m) in the records of history. From then on people concluded that girls like excitements such as being threatened with a parang while having sex and therefore came bondage and sado-masochism. Anyway, we can imagine the aftermath of the bloodshed. The tall cavepeople were very angry with the Average-height Cavepeople for the unreasonable killings of the Tallest of their kind. They decided they shall tolerate no more of such nonsense, and with a huff, they took the pre-historic heels they made for their then-still-not-that-tall cavewomen and left the place. Without the Tall Cavepeople's help to catch food, the rest suffered significant losses in their meals. Secretly the smart Short Cavepeople were inventing fishing rods and arrows and spears for easier gaming, and they once tried to teach the Average-height Cavepeople how to use those things, but they were just to dumb to learn.

Instead, the average-height Cavepeople decided that it was the Short Cavepeople's fault for whining in the first place, and started to beat the Short Cavepeople up whenever they can. The Short Cavepeople, being kind-hearted fellows actually, started to decided it IS their fault that the Tallest Caveman and Tallest Cavewoman got killed. With the beatings and the guilt, they could take it no more and migrated in an opposite direction to the Tall Cavepeople. The Average height Cavepeople were in a loss. Now, they were lazy bastards and were very happy with the Short Cavepeople's catches but now that both the Tall and Short were gone, they had no food. So they secretly followed the Short Cavepeople, and stopped a few hundred of kilometres away from them, because they discovered that their country has a few nice islands. A few earthquakes which split the earth and a few billions years later, the Tall Cavepeople found themselves in Paris, and that's why the supermodels all got "great height". The phrase "looks like a model" was actually a shortened form of "Looks like a living model of the Tallest Cavewoman". The Short Cavepeople, now having evolved into wimpy people not willing to voice any opinions (and not to mention, short), were actually there before Sang Nila Utama came to our sunny island, called Singapore. The barbaric Average-height Cavepeople, being stupid, can only watch from a distance the success of the Short community (of course they will succeed because they are smart) with a very sore eye.

They, up to this day, still bully the Short community because the Short community is tolerant and good-natured. One day, we will reach up to our limits and fire all the "Average height" workers working in our country. We see how they will survive! Alright! So now u know why height is seen as being important in our society. However, nobody stopped to think that ladders have render tree climbing useless. Boats have rendered deep river fishing useless. Cars have rendered escaping from wild animals useless, not to mention that the Sabertooth tiger is extinct. So height has no use whatsoever nowadays. It is just and age-old tradition that tall is good. Anyway long legs will get entangled in bed, so short people are better sex partners. Tall is good, but short is better. Dont be one of those stupid people so influenced by society's view. After all, short people tend to live longer. Look at those Japanese.

If this looks strangely familiar to you, well then you arent very obedient are you? To have read this thus far proves that you're not a simple person.

Anyway, i screwed my Eng Oral and its O lvl mind you. So there goes (perhaps) my A1 for Eng. I guess the one factor contributing to this is maybe beacuse the topic's crappy. Sure is, to me. But anyway, library@orchard is a conducive and decent place to go to if you wanna study. One thing though, it takes time to travel. And going to town, orchard in this case, doesnt really appeal to me now at this time of the year. I prefer chilling there after the O's. So if you need a studying partner, esp if u intend to go library@orchard, FIND ME. Just call me at 1800-darren-study-pls. If you dont want that specific venue, anywhere is also fine with me, though your house might sound fun :)


-I'll sacrifice the lamb that I do love / To Spite a raven's heart within a dove- 12th night