Wow. A rare array to Weng Seng's blog gave me renewed vigour. Heh. I hope it'll last. Always give me new perceptions to things happening around me and how to take life. Yeah. Take life from his points of view. Nothing is taken too seriously and with his "fuck-heck" attitude. Wah. He seriously enjoys life to the max.
http://www.nusclimb.com/climb-boulderactive/schedule/
Friday 23rd march 2007. atrium@orchard. Found outside Plaza Singapura, beside dhoby ghaut mrt. Finals on Sunday. Holy.
Let's go.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Thursday, March 8, 2007
You know in Meridien Shopping Centre. The one near Plaza Singapura and beside The Istana. There is a pool centre called Monster Cue and many massage parlours inside the shopping centre.
A girls walks into one of the above mentioned THAI massage parlour tended by a masseur. At this point, there is two variations to the story. One being the girl lies down on her own, without being asked to, with her back facing the ceiling. Another being the masseur asking the girl to lie down for a massage. He then proceeds with his theraphy. First, he starts with his hands massaging the girl's back. (naked or not you decide) He went down the silhouette of her sensuous figure. Ran his fingers down the smooth skin of her back and caressed the beautify creation of god placed right before him. Next, he does the massage using his legs and stands on the back of the girl. He did a few treading up and down on her back, taking care to apply pressure with every step he took. Naturally, like any other human beings, the girl cringed, gave distorted expressions, gave attempts at struggling and trying to break free and made noises/sounds/grunts from either the satisfaction of the massage or the pain of it all. Throughout this whole session from AFTER the girl was lying down already, till she was being massaged, it was witnessed by another man outside the massage parlour, through the transparent glass. (although it has to be opaque in real life) He then makes a fuss out of it. He tells his companions about it and makes a police report about a case of 'outrage of modesty' (you know the better word for it) and abusing. Oblivious to him however, was the veiled signboard above him and the fact that the place bore no ressemblance to a massage parlour despite it being surrounded by many. His friends did not stop the man from picking up the phone to call the police and none had the slightest of thought to stop him. Soon enough, the news spreaded and everyone in the shopping centre came to know of this incident. With that, the masseur's reputation is ruined, has no more integrity to live on, no more confidence to carry on with his massage career much less to venture into a new career path because of this incident, thus ruining and crushing his life. Nevermind if he was eventually caught or not.
Now tell me. How do you feel after reading the story. Malign? Injust? Well-deserved? Avoidable? This story is plainly just something the author came up with. Bears no ressemblance to reality or life whatsoever. Any ressemblance is purely coincidental. The author bears no responsibility for any uproar caused. He just wants you to see the WHOLE picture. You need not follow his train of thoughts. Any differentiation in perception of this issue is welcomed to be raised to the left of this window.
Just thought I blogged/touch the keyboard/visit this only rightful haven of mine, a platform to let my heartfelt feelings known before the terrifying, horrifying TB jab tomorrow. Pray for me. I wish for the best and to survive the jab with negavtive results. It wont affect my training, right?
A girls walks into one of the above mentioned THAI massage parlour tended by a masseur. At this point, there is two variations to the story. One being the girl lies down on her own, without being asked to, with her back facing the ceiling. Another being the masseur asking the girl to lie down for a massage. He then proceeds with his theraphy. First, he starts with his hands massaging the girl's back. (naked or not you decide) He went down the silhouette of her sensuous figure. Ran his fingers down the smooth skin of her back and caressed the beautify creation of god placed right before him. Next, he does the massage using his legs and stands on the back of the girl. He did a few treading up and down on her back, taking care to apply pressure with every step he took. Naturally, like any other human beings, the girl cringed, gave distorted expressions, gave attempts at struggling and trying to break free and made noises/sounds/grunts from either the satisfaction of the massage or the pain of it all. Throughout this whole session from AFTER the girl was lying down already, till she was being massaged, it was witnessed by another man outside the massage parlour, through the transparent glass. (although it has to be opaque in real life) He then makes a fuss out of it. He tells his companions about it and makes a police report about a case of 'outrage of modesty' (you know the better word for it) and abusing. Oblivious to him however, was the veiled signboard above him and the fact that the place bore no ressemblance to a massage parlour despite it being surrounded by many. His friends did not stop the man from picking up the phone to call the police and none had the slightest of thought to stop him. Soon enough, the news spreaded and everyone in the shopping centre came to know of this incident. With that, the masseur's reputation is ruined, has no more integrity to live on, no more confidence to carry on with his massage career much less to venture into a new career path because of this incident, thus ruining and crushing his life. Nevermind if he was eventually caught or not.
Now tell me. How do you feel after reading the story. Malign? Injust? Well-deserved? Avoidable? This story is plainly just something the author came up with. Bears no ressemblance to reality or life whatsoever. Any ressemblance is purely coincidental. The author bears no responsibility for any uproar caused. He just wants you to see the WHOLE picture. You need not follow his train of thoughts. Any differentiation in perception of this issue is welcomed to be raised to the left of this window.
Just thought I blogged/touch the keyboard/visit this only rightful haven of mine, a platform to let my heartfelt feelings known before the terrifying, horrifying TB jab tomorrow. Pray for me. I wish for the best and to survive the jab with negavtive results. It wont affect my training, right?
Sunday, March 4, 2007
its ironic.
his nick spells he wants to be a happy man. good for him. unknown to him however, is the fact that his happiness comes at the expense of mine. because he just want to live life the way as it is now which is to continue ignoring me, dao'in me, neglect and total ignore my existence and pretend this guy ( i once thought a close friend ) is not around. he just wants to to continue talking to claire. continue being normal friends with her ( if not more than friends ) continue building slowly but surely the bridge over the gap that was left unmended about two months back. he slowly gaining the momentum and amending his ways to try and fill the holes left in the friendship with claire. yes. he is a happy man. HE WILL BE HAPPY MAN. by the above elaborated way, he wants to be a happy man. but again, i repeat, its at the expense of my happiness.
i wont forget how he told me he wanted to get his dad to bring me and him out together to have a meal together. a good one. i have never doubted his taste for foood. never once did he let me down with his reccomendations. i was sincerely touhed when he told me the reason to the invitation of having a meal with his dad. according to him, he's dad would bring he's closest friend at that point of time to have a good meal satisfying the taste buds and filling the second largest organ in the body aka the stomach. like i said, it will definetly be a pleasure. one for the honour of having to have a meal with this great guy's dad and to get to know more about this close friend and the guy who brought him to this earth. and two. for probably getting a free meal from a hidden food paradise that makan sutra has probably missed out when they did their filming for the season. how touched i was to know that this special treat didnt come along often and was only bestowed on CLOSE friends of his. i was so touched i felt awkwardly gay at that point of time.
now, oh how i missed that feeling. i dont mind losing the status of being the close friend in his heart anymore. im seeing slowly that random people like joe is becoming even closer to him than i am. i dont mean harsh feelings when i use random. i use random like since neither of them have the same pdp nor share the same class. i know for one my close friend has the same taste and liking for the same girl or rather same type of girl as i do ( eg. amanda ), share the same liking for heavy beat music and nigga's rapping like T.I in justin timberlake's My Love, share the same liking for nigga songs like Run it, Take the Lead or even Chillin' with my Bitch and so on.., share the love for great food ( ok maybe he's more demanding than me considering he has more exposure to good food than me ) share the love for volleyball and so on. I can seriously go on but to third parties like you reading this post now wouldnt really connect with. cos like i said. u r the third party. you can never really feel how much we share in common and taken a fancy for similar items/objects/thing/female companion. so you cant really feel the bond i share with him. (even if he dont seem to cherish them now) i hold them truly and dearly to me heart.
what doesn't make sense to me is. how iniatially. he chose to ignore and give this cold treatment to both me and claire where he now suddenly stops and changes his decision and starts to become neutral or at the very least talks/sms to claire now. what i cant comprehend is. why does he chose to stop his cold treatment only on claire? why cant he just lift this curse im experiencing off me? How come despite the many efforts to strike a conversation with him, talk to him, be neutral to him or at least try to talk him round attempts seeem to be so totally useless? i cant help but recall the one time at bouldering area where me, jingwen, chicken him and jianming just suffered sun burns on our backs and he was sharing hes after-suntan lotion. ( im not even sure if he intended for me to use it or if he was willing to let me use it ) chicken, me jian ming and him were like topless and moaning about the pain, irritation and itch the sun burn was causing. thus he swept the bottle of lotion out to use. there they were, jianming and him both helping each other apply the lotion on each other backs. i went there being really thick skinned and all and asked meekly for some. ( i dont think he even knows or bothers ) and when i got it. i wanted so much to ask him to apply for me. but he simply walked off after he and jianming were done. fuck you if you think this is gay. if u can remember your dad holding ur penis to pee when you were 4 years old and you dont call that gay masturbating for you. and i would more than classify a friend applying some healing liquid medicine on your back where its hard for you to reach as showing tender loving care. in the end, (not that im complaining) chicken had to do it for me. now that, i feel damn gay.
i felt still felt this ever present animosity he had for me. i felt this barrier he has put up against me. all around him. shielding and avoiding me whenever possible. i think im wrong. since he doesnt avoid me. but simply ignore my god damn presence around him which i find all too painful for me to handle. nevertheless, feeling better and relieved from the irritation from the lotion i commented to him: " hey after applying i feel better already leh." to which came a monosyllabic reply :" huh. orh. okay." And then he just carried on without batting an eyelid towards me with his conversation with his new found (closer friend than i am to him) jianming. im not insulting or dispensing whatever close friendship he has for jianming. im just doing petty and envious comparisons of how he treats others ( in this case maybe jianming) so much better than how he treats me. you compare this to how he treats joshee when we were at philips place for CNY. hell, he played with the dog, threw things for her to fetch and smoother and pat and pamper her like she truly existed. what the fuck? i dont deserve that? i seriously wouldnt even mind if he fucking threw his pearl velcro on the mat and tell me to fetch with my mouth. AT LEAST for that i knew he accepted my existence as a living being (nevermind human or not). it beats getting dao'ed, ignored, neglected and everything else i've been experiencing even since two months back. you add the fact that just PERVIOUSLY only. just the moment before he decided to do this to me. we were like the closest gays. i went to his house im sure more than the number of times joe and jianming has added up together. i fucking slept on his parquet floor of his room with his dirty EM KEKE as my freaking pillow. i fucking got shocked when his brother Gigg played the hardgay toy with me where the fucking hardgay idiot just suddenly popped and jumped out like a jack in the box. he swore to show and watch the show 24 with me which he more than once tried to convince me it was a freaking good show. the words he used, his language, his usual dramatic ethics, his usual loud and flambouyant self, his usual expressive and hand-filled expressions is ever so vivid when he was describing the show. how i find it hard to forget. that time we hougang mall with jingwen and the rest when i was still slurping on my sweet talk and waiting outside the watch shop for rongjun and weicheng.
and when i saw that philip had the vcd 24 when we visited him on CNY. my first reaction was to tell him. nevermind the fact that he hasnt gotten over being angry with me and it was still the "i shall fucking ignore ur presence period" i turned and shouted for him and showed him the discovery i made on the cd rack. "a mere oh this show is damn good" was all i got. how could he have ever forgotten describing the show to me? how could he have ever forgotten attracting so much attention inside hougang mall where he acted like part of the terrorist in the show holding on to a fucking MP5? how could he have ever forgot that he swore to let me watch the vcd at his place on some random hangover night? how could he have ever forgotten sharing with this friend of his, who treasures this friendship so much, that he has already convinced him of the brilliance of the fucking terrorist show 24? and yet. at the spur of the moment. he simply seemed to only want to give a reply with the "get over and done with" sort of attitude and then just walk past and continue with his plan of "i shall fucking continue ignoring the carbon dioxide coming out of your nose".
he is the only guy in climbing club other than chicken whom i know had a direct connection and interaction with my dad. chicken has been like my 5 yr friend so it would be unfair to include him in this comparison. the night where my dad came to pick me up after training and i was still eating my sliced fish rice with soup later dinner at around 9.30pm that very wednesday. my dad saw him and started talking. "so have you ever spoke to the rocks when you were climbing?" to which he duly gave his signature reply.. "errrrrrrrrr. no." in that deep and hoarse and coarse and husky voice. and then my dad had to return with this ecentric christian-ish reply: " because the rock is jesus." yes. it was so ultimate no link to me that it was ever since embedded in my mind. and how he told me how fucking weird that conversation was and how he felt my dad was funny. i would never forget that bizzare incident. the fact that my dad was here to pick me up. meant he would have walked up to me to announce my arrival and for me to leave with him in the family car. and that fact that he spoke to my dad. with cow's inference skill you can deduce that he was sitting right infront of me. how rare, sorry, how NEVER can you find him being within 5 metre radius of me. translate thoes coordinates and vector bearings you have on the hawker centre we usually frequent after training means that he has now never shared the same table as me. even if he did. he was probably because of my desperate and dire attempts to try and close up on him and he was left with no more options and spaces to seat at. otherwise whenever possible, he probably had this "i dowan to fucking share the same oxygen with this idiot" attitude.
when claire had a cold war with him at micasa. when she refused to spoke to him i cant rmb why. i was the middleman. if im not wrong the humanly side of me or rather one human characteristic of mine, one sympathetic trait of mine told me to try and patch things up. there i was consoling him telling him that wasnt to the end of the relationship he had with claire. and there i was on the phone convincing claire to talk to him. need help? rewind to scene MY ROOM of choonwei weicheng and junyu. and pepper him the guest appearance of mr kelvin who said he liked gossiping with me and the omni-present limzy who followed kelvin wherever kelvin went in micasa. and stop at the part where i was complaining about my experiences with another guy whom i felt at serious issues against me. i wont forget how rongjun was trying to convince me that i was being sensitive and the guy i was complaining about had no sensitive nerves or feelings whatsoever at that point of time. and how junyu was the silent killer who only made comments and remarks and with each rare statement that he did make from his mouth was ever so striaght to the point. how limzy was slowly soaking up all the gossips in climbing club without daring to make a noise for fear of getting chased out. how kelvin was enjoying the company of the friends he had and enjoying every moment of that gossip session. how injust i felt being treated badly by that guy i was complaining about. and HOW HE WAS LAMENTING on ending the relationship he had with claire. on the otherhand i was lying to claire saying that he felt really apologetic and was sorry for what wrong doings he had done leading to the result of she dao;in him. and how he had given up on po'in and trying to patch things up. i wont forget how he insulted me that only i would stopp so low to please a girl. and he made the statement :" my father told me nu ren bu ky yi hong de" or sth to this extent which i am very sure and can bet my life on. he was so full of himself and was so indignant and didnt want to apologetic or willing to bow his head down to whatever he might have done wrong (which till this point is still subjective) i seriously wont forget him saying that "come on la darren only you wil stoop so low" and sth like saying " nan ren yao you nan ren de zhun yan" saying we should have mans pride and whatever shit i cannot remember but it was in reply to my constant requests for him to apologise to her and po her. i rmb all this because just one week before the trip claire got tricked into believing that i lost my handphone and she was really furious after finding out the truth. i told him that i was the pathetic loser who went on my knees to beg for forgiveness despite the fact that i did not want anything to have happened and that i did not intended for that trick to have taken place. and yet im apologising for my friends wrong doing and one that was done while i was having my hair cut and did not know about the incident till after my hair-cut sesssion was over. i wont forget how he was initially pissed at me also caused when i called him to try and explain things to him and claire ( they were tgr at bouldering area while i was at katong cuttin hair) since claire refused to pick up my call feeling angry and all about being cheated. and thus i resorted to callin him on his phone. his initial reaction was to curse me and hang up the phone. i called the second time choosing to trust that at that point of time he was the more rational one to listen to me and with him i would hav more hopes of getting my situation across that i did not know what happened at all to emotion-filled claire who is not rational when she is emotional. i called the second time and desperately yelled for him to listen to me, not hang up the phone and to hear me out. true enough, he didnt hung up the phone and could even tell me to trust him that he would pacify her. im recalling this incident cos i was the ever pathetic one going on my knees to ask for forgiveness whenever there was such situation nevermind if i was in the wrong or not. i told this to him at micasa. hoping for him to do likewise at that point of time to salvage the situation he had with claire.
and now. lol. its a joke now how he can openly talk to claire now. while i dont get that honours. the effort is inversely proportional i tell you. efforts made to try and talk to him, strike a conversation with him leads to me gettin zero results. on the other hand claire does nothing and yet he chose to end the cold war with her and not me. why is this so? why is it i have to "di shen xia qi" and yet recieve no results. yet claire who despite making her choice ( which by right should induce and invoke more feelings against him ) and not making any apparent attempts to talk to him (to me) . still lead to the ultimate untanglement of the knot in the relationship? is this justified?
at one point of time when he wasnt talkin to both of us. we were suffering. and yet when there was a slightest sign of acceptance of his part on either claire or me, im happy. now. im forced to be happy cos he's finally talkin to claire. do i have the right as a guy, as a friend to feel jealous? jealous of claire and jealous of him? jealous of claire since she finally gets acceptance from him and that he has stopped ignoring her. and jealous of him cos he gets to talk and converse and do everything openly with her now and yet i dont? if i do. tongues will wag and neither of us feels comfortable. so why can he just lead his normal life while i hav to go out of way to maybe have a small talk with claire without being accused of having sth with her?
he was the one who initiated who demanded for me" to be a man" and wanted to me to take actions if not it would be torturous for him to see me not "treasure what i have" now im doing it. is he satisfied? his treatment on me makes me question my decision and seriously makes me think twice. ive done and is doing what he wanted me to but he now chooses to ignore me after ive taken his words. what is this? not doing what he said = gettin reprimanded not treasuring what i have. after claiming what i rightfully deserve i get tortured by his sufferings. wtf?
everyone in the club. first thing step into the bouldering area in the morn of road run and just after the road run gets treated to pineapple tarts. while i am not openly invited nor asked nor allowed to have any portion of it i was left to quietly steal some when he wasnt around. despicable act? lowly? thief? i just figured i wanted to try some of my friend's mother's cooking. as simple as that. yet i couldnt have the luxury of doing it openly. for fear of rejection. i had to resort to such lowly means to derive satistaction by the tarts on my taste buds but at the risk of gettin seeen and giving him the impression that i did it without being asked to. everyone was treated to it. personally. verball by him. thoes he declined were forced by him to try. even random people like arvin who merely made a rare guest appearance of about 5-15mins and kellyn who didnt stayed longer than 5 secs. were asked to try. i WASNT EVEN FUCKING LOOKED AT. fuck this. fuck this little rat here scattering for food ( good food at that ) and have to consume only when owner's not around. fuck this rat who doesnt deserved being called by the name and fuck this rat who doesnt deserve to be even looked at. he probably didnt even looked in my way in my directions and thoes who were behind of infront of me probably suffered until they walked away from me.
fuck this post for taking 2 hrs of my time figuring ouy my blogger account and password. and taking so fucking long to complete and edit. for that. im not even finished and im feelin screwed up. everything is going down hill.
fucking got a 0 for maths vectors test. 8th in mock comp vs an expected 5th by philip. screwed up swollen fucking painful fingers which cant fucking climb now. fucking stupid endurance which i cant even finish the blue endurance route and cant even pass 21. fucking one more day to phy test and i know nth. and fuckin 20 days left to boulderactive and my finger strength hasnt even come back. much less to recover from its swellness.
great. academically im being labelled stupid by mrs tag for my poor maths results. physically im weak like anything without finger strength and swollen fingers. socially im gettin ignored by one of my closest friends im losing now. and suffering from heart torments everytime im with her. fuck this. just dont let emo monster take over me. life cant get worse den this
his nick spells he wants to be a happy man. good for him. unknown to him however, is the fact that his happiness comes at the expense of mine. because he just want to live life the way as it is now which is to continue ignoring me, dao'in me, neglect and total ignore my existence and pretend this guy ( i once thought a close friend ) is not around. he just wants to to continue talking to claire. continue being normal friends with her ( if not more than friends ) continue building slowly but surely the bridge over the gap that was left unmended about two months back. he slowly gaining the momentum and amending his ways to try and fill the holes left in the friendship with claire. yes. he is a happy man. HE WILL BE HAPPY MAN. by the above elaborated way, he wants to be a happy man. but again, i repeat, its at the expense of my happiness.
i wont forget how he told me he wanted to get his dad to bring me and him out together to have a meal together. a good one. i have never doubted his taste for foood. never once did he let me down with his reccomendations. i was sincerely touhed when he told me the reason to the invitation of having a meal with his dad. according to him, he's dad would bring he's closest friend at that point of time to have a good meal satisfying the taste buds and filling the second largest organ in the body aka the stomach. like i said, it will definetly be a pleasure. one for the honour of having to have a meal with this great guy's dad and to get to know more about this close friend and the guy who brought him to this earth. and two. for probably getting a free meal from a hidden food paradise that makan sutra has probably missed out when they did their filming for the season. how touched i was to know that this special treat didnt come along often and was only bestowed on CLOSE friends of his. i was so touched i felt awkwardly gay at that point of time.
now, oh how i missed that feeling. i dont mind losing the status of being the close friend in his heart anymore. im seeing slowly that random people like joe is becoming even closer to him than i am. i dont mean harsh feelings when i use random. i use random like since neither of them have the same pdp nor share the same class. i know for one my close friend has the same taste and liking for the same girl or rather same type of girl as i do ( eg. amanda ), share the same liking for heavy beat music and nigga's rapping like T.I in justin timberlake's My Love, share the same liking for nigga songs like Run it, Take the Lead or even Chillin' with my Bitch and so on.., share the love for great food ( ok maybe he's more demanding than me considering he has more exposure to good food than me ) share the love for volleyball and so on. I can seriously go on but to third parties like you reading this post now wouldnt really connect with. cos like i said. u r the third party. you can never really feel how much we share in common and taken a fancy for similar items/objects/thing/female companion. so you cant really feel the bond i share with him. (even if he dont seem to cherish them now) i hold them truly and dearly to me heart.
what doesn't make sense to me is. how iniatially. he chose to ignore and give this cold treatment to both me and claire where he now suddenly stops and changes his decision and starts to become neutral or at the very least talks/sms to claire now. what i cant comprehend is. why does he chose to stop his cold treatment only on claire? why cant he just lift this curse im experiencing off me? How come despite the many efforts to strike a conversation with him, talk to him, be neutral to him or at least try to talk him round attempts seeem to be so totally useless? i cant help but recall the one time at bouldering area where me, jingwen, chicken him and jianming just suffered sun burns on our backs and he was sharing hes after-suntan lotion. ( im not even sure if he intended for me to use it or if he was willing to let me use it ) chicken, me jian ming and him were like topless and moaning about the pain, irritation and itch the sun burn was causing. thus he swept the bottle of lotion out to use. there they were, jianming and him both helping each other apply the lotion on each other backs. i went there being really thick skinned and all and asked meekly for some. ( i dont think he even knows or bothers ) and when i got it. i wanted so much to ask him to apply for me. but he simply walked off after he and jianming were done. fuck you if you think this is gay. if u can remember your dad holding ur penis to pee when you were 4 years old and you dont call that gay masturbating for you. and i would more than classify a friend applying some healing liquid medicine on your back where its hard for you to reach as showing tender loving care. in the end, (not that im complaining) chicken had to do it for me. now that, i feel damn gay.
i felt still felt this ever present animosity he had for me. i felt this barrier he has put up against me. all around him. shielding and avoiding me whenever possible. i think im wrong. since he doesnt avoid me. but simply ignore my god damn presence around him which i find all too painful for me to handle. nevertheless, feeling better and relieved from the irritation from the lotion i commented to him: " hey after applying i feel better already leh." to which came a monosyllabic reply :" huh. orh. okay." And then he just carried on without batting an eyelid towards me with his conversation with his new found (closer friend than i am to him) jianming. im not insulting or dispensing whatever close friendship he has for jianming. im just doing petty and envious comparisons of how he treats others ( in this case maybe jianming) so much better than how he treats me. you compare this to how he treats joshee when we were at philips place for CNY. hell, he played with the dog, threw things for her to fetch and smoother and pat and pamper her like she truly existed. what the fuck? i dont deserve that? i seriously wouldnt even mind if he fucking threw his pearl velcro on the mat and tell me to fetch with my mouth. AT LEAST for that i knew he accepted my existence as a living being (nevermind human or not). it beats getting dao'ed, ignored, neglected and everything else i've been experiencing even since two months back. you add the fact that just PERVIOUSLY only. just the moment before he decided to do this to me. we were like the closest gays. i went to his house im sure more than the number of times joe and jianming has added up together. i fucking slept on his parquet floor of his room with his dirty EM KEKE as my freaking pillow. i fucking got shocked when his brother Gigg played the hardgay toy with me where the fucking hardgay idiot just suddenly popped and jumped out like a jack in the box. he swore to show and watch the show 24 with me which he more than once tried to convince me it was a freaking good show. the words he used, his language, his usual dramatic ethics, his usual loud and flambouyant self, his usual expressive and hand-filled expressions is ever so vivid when he was describing the show. how i find it hard to forget. that time we hougang mall with jingwen and the rest when i was still slurping on my sweet talk and waiting outside the watch shop for rongjun and weicheng.
and when i saw that philip had the vcd 24 when we visited him on CNY. my first reaction was to tell him. nevermind the fact that he hasnt gotten over being angry with me and it was still the "i shall fucking ignore ur presence period" i turned and shouted for him and showed him the discovery i made on the cd rack. "a mere oh this show is damn good" was all i got. how could he have ever forgotten describing the show to me? how could he have ever forgotten attracting so much attention inside hougang mall where he acted like part of the terrorist in the show holding on to a fucking MP5? how could he have ever forgot that he swore to let me watch the vcd at his place on some random hangover night? how could he have ever forgotten sharing with this friend of his, who treasures this friendship so much, that he has already convinced him of the brilliance of the fucking terrorist show 24? and yet. at the spur of the moment. he simply seemed to only want to give a reply with the "get over and done with" sort of attitude and then just walk past and continue with his plan of "i shall fucking continue ignoring the carbon dioxide coming out of your nose".
he is the only guy in climbing club other than chicken whom i know had a direct connection and interaction with my dad. chicken has been like my 5 yr friend so it would be unfair to include him in this comparison. the night where my dad came to pick me up after training and i was still eating my sliced fish rice with soup later dinner at around 9.30pm that very wednesday. my dad saw him and started talking. "so have you ever spoke to the rocks when you were climbing?" to which he duly gave his signature reply.. "errrrrrrrrr. no." in that deep and hoarse and coarse and husky voice. and then my dad had to return with this ecentric christian-ish reply: " because the rock is jesus." yes. it was so ultimate no link to me that it was ever since embedded in my mind. and how he told me how fucking weird that conversation was and how he felt my dad was funny. i would never forget that bizzare incident. the fact that my dad was here to pick me up. meant he would have walked up to me to announce my arrival and for me to leave with him in the family car. and that fact that he spoke to my dad. with cow's inference skill you can deduce that he was sitting right infront of me. how rare, sorry, how NEVER can you find him being within 5 metre radius of me. translate thoes coordinates and vector bearings you have on the hawker centre we usually frequent after training means that he has now never shared the same table as me. even if he did. he was probably because of my desperate and dire attempts to try and close up on him and he was left with no more options and spaces to seat at. otherwise whenever possible, he probably had this "i dowan to fucking share the same oxygen with this idiot" attitude.
when claire had a cold war with him at micasa. when she refused to spoke to him i cant rmb why. i was the middleman. if im not wrong the humanly side of me or rather one human characteristic of mine, one sympathetic trait of mine told me to try and patch things up. there i was consoling him telling him that wasnt to the end of the relationship he had with claire. and there i was on the phone convincing claire to talk to him. need help? rewind to scene MY ROOM of choonwei weicheng and junyu. and pepper him the guest appearance of mr kelvin who said he liked gossiping with me and the omni-present limzy who followed kelvin wherever kelvin went in micasa. and stop at the part where i was complaining about my experiences with another guy whom i felt at serious issues against me. i wont forget how rongjun was trying to convince me that i was being sensitive and the guy i was complaining about had no sensitive nerves or feelings whatsoever at that point of time. and how junyu was the silent killer who only made comments and remarks and with each rare statement that he did make from his mouth was ever so striaght to the point. how limzy was slowly soaking up all the gossips in climbing club without daring to make a noise for fear of getting chased out. how kelvin was enjoying the company of the friends he had and enjoying every moment of that gossip session. how injust i felt being treated badly by that guy i was complaining about. and HOW HE WAS LAMENTING on ending the relationship he had with claire. on the otherhand i was lying to claire saying that he felt really apologetic and was sorry for what wrong doings he had done leading to the result of she dao;in him. and how he had given up on po'in and trying to patch things up. i wont forget how he insulted me that only i would stopp so low to please a girl. and he made the statement :" my father told me nu ren bu ky yi hong de" or sth to this extent which i am very sure and can bet my life on. he was so full of himself and was so indignant and didnt want to apologetic or willing to bow his head down to whatever he might have done wrong (which till this point is still subjective) i seriously wont forget him saying that "come on la darren only you wil stoop so low" and sth like saying " nan ren yao you nan ren de zhun yan" saying we should have mans pride and whatever shit i cannot remember but it was in reply to my constant requests for him to apologise to her and po her. i rmb all this because just one week before the trip claire got tricked into believing that i lost my handphone and she was really furious after finding out the truth. i told him that i was the pathetic loser who went on my knees to beg for forgiveness despite the fact that i did not want anything to have happened and that i did not intended for that trick to have taken place. and yet im apologising for my friends wrong doing and one that was done while i was having my hair cut and did not know about the incident till after my hair-cut sesssion was over. i wont forget how he was initially pissed at me also caused when i called him to try and explain things to him and claire ( they were tgr at bouldering area while i was at katong cuttin hair) since claire refused to pick up my call feeling angry and all about being cheated. and thus i resorted to callin him on his phone. his initial reaction was to curse me and hang up the phone. i called the second time choosing to trust that at that point of time he was the more rational one to listen to me and with him i would hav more hopes of getting my situation across that i did not know what happened at all to emotion-filled claire who is not rational when she is emotional. i called the second time and desperately yelled for him to listen to me, not hang up the phone and to hear me out. true enough, he didnt hung up the phone and could even tell me to trust him that he would pacify her. im recalling this incident cos i was the ever pathetic one going on my knees to ask for forgiveness whenever there was such situation nevermind if i was in the wrong or not. i told this to him at micasa. hoping for him to do likewise at that point of time to salvage the situation he had with claire.
and now. lol. its a joke now how he can openly talk to claire now. while i dont get that honours. the effort is inversely proportional i tell you. efforts made to try and talk to him, strike a conversation with him leads to me gettin zero results. on the other hand claire does nothing and yet he chose to end the cold war with her and not me. why is this so? why is it i have to "di shen xia qi" and yet recieve no results. yet claire who despite making her choice ( which by right should induce and invoke more feelings against him ) and not making any apparent attempts to talk to him (to me) . still lead to the ultimate untanglement of the knot in the relationship? is this justified?
at one point of time when he wasnt talkin to both of us. we were suffering. and yet when there was a slightest sign of acceptance of his part on either claire or me, im happy. now. im forced to be happy cos he's finally talkin to claire. do i have the right as a guy, as a friend to feel jealous? jealous of claire and jealous of him? jealous of claire since she finally gets acceptance from him and that he has stopped ignoring her. and jealous of him cos he gets to talk and converse and do everything openly with her now and yet i dont? if i do. tongues will wag and neither of us feels comfortable. so why can he just lead his normal life while i hav to go out of way to maybe have a small talk with claire without being accused of having sth with her?
he was the one who initiated who demanded for me" to be a man" and wanted to me to take actions if not it would be torturous for him to see me not "treasure what i have" now im doing it. is he satisfied? his treatment on me makes me question my decision and seriously makes me think twice. ive done and is doing what he wanted me to but he now chooses to ignore me after ive taken his words. what is this? not doing what he said = gettin reprimanded not treasuring what i have. after claiming what i rightfully deserve i get tortured by his sufferings. wtf?
everyone in the club. first thing step into the bouldering area in the morn of road run and just after the road run gets treated to pineapple tarts. while i am not openly invited nor asked nor allowed to have any portion of it i was left to quietly steal some when he wasnt around. despicable act? lowly? thief? i just figured i wanted to try some of my friend's mother's cooking. as simple as that. yet i couldnt have the luxury of doing it openly. for fear of rejection. i had to resort to such lowly means to derive satistaction by the tarts on my taste buds but at the risk of gettin seeen and giving him the impression that i did it without being asked to. everyone was treated to it. personally. verball by him. thoes he declined were forced by him to try. even random people like arvin who merely made a rare guest appearance of about 5-15mins and kellyn who didnt stayed longer than 5 secs. were asked to try. i WASNT EVEN FUCKING LOOKED AT. fuck this. fuck this little rat here scattering for food ( good food at that ) and have to consume only when owner's not around. fuck this rat who doesnt deserved being called by the name and fuck this rat who doesnt deserve to be even looked at. he probably didnt even looked in my way in my directions and thoes who were behind of infront of me probably suffered until they walked away from me.
fuck this post for taking 2 hrs of my time figuring ouy my blogger account and password. and taking so fucking long to complete and edit. for that. im not even finished and im feelin screwed up. everything is going down hill.
fucking got a 0 for maths vectors test. 8th in mock comp vs an expected 5th by philip. screwed up swollen fucking painful fingers which cant fucking climb now. fucking stupid endurance which i cant even finish the blue endurance route and cant even pass 21. fucking one more day to phy test and i know nth. and fuckin 20 days left to boulderactive and my finger strength hasnt even come back. much less to recover from its swellness.
great. academically im being labelled stupid by mrs tag for my poor maths results. physically im weak like anything without finger strength and swollen fingers. socially im gettin ignored by one of my closest friends im losing now. and suffering from heart torments everytime im with her. fuck this. just dont let emo monster take over me. life cant get worse den this
Sunday, January 21, 2007
As best as i can, I shall fill in any unfilled information in my life since my last post, which is like 1jan? so long ago already man. ok lets go.
Orientation 07
made many many new friends. many of them sporty, committed and dedicated to their cca and of cos leadership qualities are aplenty. they're cool. people whom i can really connect and clique with.. and they dont really have major problesm or attitudes which i see in other ogms which i wouldnt exactly like. it was a thrilling experience having to try and bond unknowns tgr.. gettin them high.. though its cliche standard normal orientation kinds of camps, this one is closer to heart since these friends u try and bond will come and stay. unlike thoes in OBS where u would most probably lose their contact after some time. plus i see many of them making it big in the future haviing great potential to hold high-end ranks in thier respective cca. ok i think i like that say most people also wont get what i mean. just get this point across. my ogms are damn cooool. damn nice... damn GOOD and everything positive u can think of. and they just made my life in jc more exciting. and that i had great fun during orientation despite having to rush down from NUS mock comp which i came in second last in and i actually took a freaking cab down costing abt 5-10 bucks and still managed to MISS the complete MASS DANCE AT SUNTEC. ok im quite sore at missing that mass dance since i alr missed it last yr. ok next.
MEGA ROOF
ok this happened just ytd SAT 20 jan which is jingwens bday. we had interval climbing where everyone must at least 6 climbs on the wall. i tot i would dread it or i wouldnt do that well since my endurance isnt exactly that good and i cant regulate my enegery very well. but ytd proved me wrong. i am gettin better. and i NEED to get better. terence scissors paper stone with me to see who shall do the first climb which is to lead up yellow overhang. i actually lost. still in abit of disbelief and abiot of reluctant to lead climb up first since it will sap off more energy. still i did it. and regretted abit after that climb. no worries. this is supposed to be trng and tough. den it was the girls white route on panel which was supposed to be thier onsight climb. ok quite easy. just a mini yellow overhang with lesser dynamic moves on the panel. tts all. then time to onsight a route set by philip. stress pressure and everything mounted. everyone b4 me did it well. i felt the need to uphold the standard. ok well enought i actually did it. with alot of nervousness and pressure. ok now mega. i had alot of energy since i rested long enough for this route. i heck cared the part whr i forgotten most of the sequence and went up with pure animal instincts. this part where i fell. i was heel hookin with my right feet. and holdin a turnin tile with my left hand. right leg hook left hand holding onto tile. left feet flaggin and left hand going up toward the other tile. while i was barely touching the next tile with my right hand... my left hand hold turned and down i went. i fell down with my right feet staill heel hookin and naturally i fell upside down with my right feet still in the air. my left feet got coiled around the rope and now i have a rope burn. woah. u can only feel so much when u read this here. imagine when u see me do it at the second roof of the mega roof. scary.
Jingwen bday
cool. hardrock cafe. music at times noisy and loud. but the food is goooooood and ex. 158.50 for 5 people. hahahahaha. took pics. walk to esplande. did nth there. went home. btw HAPPY BDAY JW. i guess he is rili apologetic that he cant get the other climbers along though he would love to.
lost wallet
i lost my wallet on 20jan morning on my way to sch for training. i left it on my lap. when i got on 229. and wheni got off 229 at the busstop opp tj, it probably dropped off and i didnt realise this until i walked to sch throw my bag on the bouldering mats. and reached into my bag lookin for my wallet and handphone to put in my pocket. woah. no wallet. claire being her usual DAMN HELPFUL and NICE girl, took cab with me to chase the 229 bus. i got on. found this familiar guy whom i recognise when i got on 229. i asked him if he saw it. and apparently he had swapped seats to sit at the position where i was sittin previously on 229! i asked him. he gave this innocent action and shook his head. i was left to find the wallet desperaetely on the bus. to no avail. well. wallet gone. ez link gone. climb asia card with the CUTE foto gone. 10 bucks gone. house key gone. atm card gone!!! lucky no IC. and the replacement of my lost items are easy to replace but still. 19 bucks to replace ez link card. 5 to replace atm card. hell. i hate my carelessness.
i dowan anything from u. just sms me happy bday on 12:00am 25jan i think i'll get super high. and of cos make my 25jan a special day can le. i repeeat. I DOWAN PRESENTS. I DOWAN ANYTHING FROM U. dont buy me anything. not even a cake.
im serious. just wish me happy bday. and make my 25 jan 18th bday a sweet day is more than sufficient. i'll throw the present back at u if u give me anything.
I DON'T WANT PRESENTS
Orientation 07
made many many new friends. many of them sporty, committed and dedicated to their cca and of cos leadership qualities are aplenty. they're cool. people whom i can really connect and clique with.. and they dont really have major problesm or attitudes which i see in other ogms which i wouldnt exactly like. it was a thrilling experience having to try and bond unknowns tgr.. gettin them high.. though its cliche standard normal orientation kinds of camps, this one is closer to heart since these friends u try and bond will come and stay. unlike thoes in OBS where u would most probably lose their contact after some time. plus i see many of them making it big in the future haviing great potential to hold high-end ranks in thier respective cca. ok i think i like that say most people also wont get what i mean. just get this point across. my ogms are damn cooool. damn nice... damn GOOD and everything positive u can think of. and they just made my life in jc more exciting. and that i had great fun during orientation despite having to rush down from NUS mock comp which i came in second last in and i actually took a freaking cab down costing abt 5-10 bucks and still managed to MISS the complete MASS DANCE AT SUNTEC. ok im quite sore at missing that mass dance since i alr missed it last yr. ok next.
MEGA ROOF
ok this happened just ytd SAT 20 jan which is jingwens bday. we had interval climbing where everyone must at least 6 climbs on the wall. i tot i would dread it or i wouldnt do that well since my endurance isnt exactly that good and i cant regulate my enegery very well. but ytd proved me wrong. i am gettin better. and i NEED to get better. terence scissors paper stone with me to see who shall do the first climb which is to lead up yellow overhang. i actually lost. still in abit of disbelief and abiot of reluctant to lead climb up first since it will sap off more energy. still i did it. and regretted abit after that climb. no worries. this is supposed to be trng and tough. den it was the girls white route on panel which was supposed to be thier onsight climb. ok quite easy. just a mini yellow overhang with lesser dynamic moves on the panel. tts all. then time to onsight a route set by philip. stress pressure and everything mounted. everyone b4 me did it well. i felt the need to uphold the standard. ok well enought i actually did it. with alot of nervousness and pressure. ok now mega. i had alot of energy since i rested long enough for this route. i heck cared the part whr i forgotten most of the sequence and went up with pure animal instincts. this part where i fell. i was heel hookin with my right feet. and holdin a turnin tile with my left hand. right leg hook left hand holding onto tile. left feet flaggin and left hand going up toward the other tile. while i was barely touching the next tile with my right hand... my left hand hold turned and down i went. i fell down with my right feet staill heel hookin and naturally i fell upside down with my right feet still in the air. my left feet got coiled around the rope and now i have a rope burn. woah. u can only feel so much when u read this here. imagine when u see me do it at the second roof of the mega roof. scary.
Jingwen bday
cool. hardrock cafe. music at times noisy and loud. but the food is goooooood and ex. 158.50 for 5 people. hahahahaha. took pics. walk to esplande. did nth there. went home. btw HAPPY BDAY JW. i guess he is rili apologetic that he cant get the other climbers along though he would love to.
lost wallet
i lost my wallet on 20jan morning on my way to sch for training. i left it on my lap. when i got on 229. and wheni got off 229 at the busstop opp tj, it probably dropped off and i didnt realise this until i walked to sch throw my bag on the bouldering mats. and reached into my bag lookin for my wallet and handphone to put in my pocket. woah. no wallet. claire being her usual DAMN HELPFUL and NICE girl, took cab with me to chase the 229 bus. i got on. found this familiar guy whom i recognise when i got on 229. i asked him if he saw it. and apparently he had swapped seats to sit at the position where i was sittin previously on 229! i asked him. he gave this innocent action and shook his head. i was left to find the wallet desperaetely on the bus. to no avail. well. wallet gone. ez link gone. climb asia card with the CUTE foto gone. 10 bucks gone. house key gone. atm card gone!!! lucky no IC. and the replacement of my lost items are easy to replace but still. 19 bucks to replace ez link card. 5 to replace atm card. hell. i hate my carelessness.
i dowan anything from u. just sms me happy bday on 12:00am 25jan i think i'll get super high. and of cos make my 25jan a special day can le. i repeeat. I DOWAN PRESENTS. I DOWAN ANYTHING FROM U. dont buy me anything. not even a cake.
im serious. just wish me happy bday. and make my 25 jan 18th bday a sweet day is more than sufficient. i'll throw the present back at u if u give me anything.
I DON'T WANT PRESENTS
Monday, January 1, 2007
2007 Resolution for Darren Yuen!
1. Don't be late. ( ok maybe give waiver of 5-15 mins? :P )
2. Ace my A's.
3.Be a perfect and flawless human being as best as possible in every aspect. ( that has been my dream since long ago actually )
4. To come back and add more onto this list and fulfil them.
Wishes for 2007!
1. Happiness to everyone i know.
2. Grow taller.
Birthday Wishlist : Its freakin 25 days away. You better prepare something.
1. A high-end good quality Shaver. Something like Gilette Mach3 triple blade or something like that. with a YEAR's supply of blades. ( mind u im using hotels disposable shaver currently. explains my not-so-clean shave but yet sporting a damn handsome smile on a cute face )
2. A zinc or ink or some not so branded and expensive bag for school purpose. My current silver sling zinc bag is giving way liao. Preferably a big bag. cos zinc bags are usually small. I dont mind a big one ( in that sense ) comparable size to my current one. And nice enought to be brought out in home clothes and Sch Uni. Can get it at bugis street? At good bargain? below 40 for sure. Sling or back pack kinds are okay with me. as long as its cool and meant for school purpose.
3. Skinny cut JEANS! waist size is 28-30!!! This will be abit ex though. I dont mind any jeans from far east. heh. i was dreaming only...
4. Ankle socks! The kinds that is so short it stops at below ur ankle kind. Thoes type people think its for girls kind. Usually found at some push carts inside Bugis junction. The kinds me and Shuhui likes to wear. I have a white and pink pair. White one's gone missing. Any colour is cool with me. Ostentious colours will not be bought at your own risk. But rather at mine for your own viewing pleasure. So its really up to my guts to wear whatever loud colours you can find and get for me. I promise i'll wear.. =D
5. pencil case.. wallet.. tshirts.. i think they are okay gifts but i dont think i really need them now.. But if you find a cool wallet at the Wallet Shop something by Stranger products will still be cool with me. But its quite ex tho. 50? Stranger stuffs are ex. But if u really get me that.. i'll stop using my current brown billabong one immediately. pls no myuk wallets for me. unless it looks damn cool...
soccer today at adrians place was cool. way cool. plaed at some fenced up pitch. some reactangular foot ball field. divied into three. so there are 3 pitches within that reactangular field. green and high fences around the place. the entrance is at the bustop there. third stop of bus 27 from hougang interchange. no need to book. nice goal post. like street soccer type. but the pitch is a big bigger and has no walls la.
adrian, his bro, his two friends from tp one of them called jiajun, weng inn, yongkai and me. IMBA TEAM i tell u. ok maybe not imba but its imba cos im in it. im serious. i reach there late like. 3plus. tho i told them i'll reach at 2.45. lol. anw. the bus journey there was lonely. and.. not used to. since there was an absence of a presence. anyway. they called me at like. 1.50pm and i was like. ok cool. take my mind of things and to chill and to get back my leg muscle. my leg muscle is shrinking u know? my sec2 class photo shows two bulging muscles at my calves. den recently one day i looked down. and i saw two skinny sticks. im utterly shock. i use to haf muscles like thoes of eepin on my feet. i swear. now its shrunk. must be due to the lack of training and the lack of leg exercises. badminton did demand alot of footwork and leg mucles from me having to jump and all. anyway i want to back my leg muscles. and recalling i had a hard time getting out of bed becos of my nerve wrecking brainstorming session i had while i was half concsious on my bed, i figured it would be cool to chill with some dudes like wenginn. so off i went. alone on this bus ride. at the hougaang interchange. at the bus 27 berth. so near to the seats outside the toilet whr i know far too well...
went there. saw them. asked them how was it there. they told me they got thrashed. harder and worse tthan the one at marina bay. i was like. okay. it started to scare me. i checked out the opponents. they were tall and big like aged 18-21. like in army kind. and seemed a big ah beng-ish. considering ah bengs dun play soccer. so ok heck. we started the game. nice and smooth sailing. they attacked well.. and we defended well. of cos with adrian holding the defense tgr. there were times of brilliance in our attackin when i had chances infront of the goal. only to see it being blocked by the keeper. ok fine darren. shot off targets is more than shot on target. u gotta improve. den suddenly..
i broke the deadlock.
AR HUH. darren is on fire. wenginn released me from the right. i caught the ball as i ran towards the centre and infront of the goal. and fired a weak shot with my right leg. i rmb i was only hoping for the best and that the keeper wouldnt save or block it. only to be caught by surprise when i heard the ball hit the back of the goal post. it aint a net. it was a metal net. CHIANG. yay its a goal! i didnt expect much seriously when i released that shot for it was weak and from the previous encounters infront of goal with that goalkeeping. i thought he would have saved it easily. heh. maybe my presence and commanding aura infont of him was too overwhelming this time. hehe. anyway. i scored the first goal.
usual cocky darren. became really tired and exhasuted, him being lousy and having low stamina after some running.. i sat back to defend and decided to slack.. i dont rmb the exact details and sequence of events. except that i became goal keep for one short stint becus i was really tired from the running. heh. anyway i kept my clean sheet and did some tyco saves. it was really tyco. just happened to lift my knee and the shot just happened to come in tt direction. so it looked like a really cool save and everyone was impressed. i rmb yongkai or adrian going.. " wahhhh darren." as i went off to pick the ball which flew off after hittin my knee. heh. darren is potential keeper. anw after i sub'ed out again. i dunno what happened. but two goals was scored against us.
the first goal came becos we were too up front and was too slow in coming back to defend when they counter attacked. leaving behind only adrian n e keeper to defend the goal and it was 4v2. so naturally they scored. adrian was rili frustrated at that time becos of there wasnt any defense. i am guilty of it since i seldom run back to defend and prefer to slack infront. the next goal came subsequently it was a stupid goal since wenginn was the goalkeeper and i could tell he was really tired. cos i was alr tired when i scored the first goal. so i became goalkee to slack. and when i was goalkeeper. i kept distributing the goal kicks to weng inn as i trusted him more. i wanted him to have the ball. rather den i pass the ball to someone up front and for them to lose the ball and it becomes an attacking opportunity for them which means im in trouble. so i would always pass to wenginn for him to start the attack. this made him tired as he had to constantly playmake after i pass the ball to him from goal kick. in short. i made him tired.
so he wanted to slack and it was his turn to be keeper while i played upfront. this happened after the opponents scored their first goal. so the second goal came. with wenginn a tired and slack-ish goalkeeper was infront of goal. he hardly bat an eyelid or made an attempt to save the second goal score b the opponents. heh.
so ok fine. 2-1 down. i was really tired and i was thinking it was a goner alr. and i kept thinking of the score line. from 0-0. i made it 1-0. den suddenly its 1-1. becos of poor defending. and the 4v2 thingy. so i cant blame anyone for it. den at 1-1 it seemed like it was at 0-0 again since it was again a tie. so i tot well its okay. the game has just restarted itself. we're back to square one. den wenginn , in a sense, opened the goal post for them to score hence making it 2-1. and den the pressure dawned upon me. upon a tired me. tt suddenly its up to me to tie the game. or the just lose the game completely cos once they score anmother goal to make it 3-1, the game is effectively over. so it was either i save some chanecs for the team by scoring another goal to tie the game. or to either defend and hope they dont make it 3-1. me being tired and all. forced myself into proper game play. i started to play properly tackling whenever nesscessry and running and chiong'in for the ball whenever there;s an attaack. and guess what. my efforts paid off.
there was a long lob from their keeper and adrian was up to defend and to head the ball away from the striker. he did it nicely and the ball was headed back up front for me. becos of the long and high lob from the keeper, half the opponents team were alr on ourside of the field. hence adrian;s head on the ball left me quite empty and free to attack. that header released the beast in me. the ball flew over me. bounced in front of me once. and came up a very small distance again. by this time i was near the post and i just swpt the ball in mid air few inches of the ground into the post. woah. superb first touch scoring. i was awed at myself. 2-2. well done.
by that time. the game is up alr. but they insisted on playin more. so we played awhile longer b4 going off. i gave yk and wenginn a tour around hg mall for abt45 mins. hoping only to see someone i know at hg mall.
Lyrics to the song on my blog. Sums up how i feel now.
http://www.angelfire.com/in4/hits/whathurtsthemost.html">daniel
1. Don't be late. ( ok maybe give waiver of 5-15 mins? :P )
2. Ace my A's.
3.Be a perfect and flawless human being as best as possible in every aspect. ( that has been my dream since long ago actually )
4. To come back and add more onto this list and fulfil them.
Wishes for 2007!
1. Happiness to everyone i know.
2. Grow taller.
Birthday Wishlist : Its freakin 25 days away. You better prepare something.
1. A high-end good quality Shaver. Something like Gilette Mach3 triple blade or something like that. with a YEAR's supply of blades. ( mind u im using hotels disposable shaver currently. explains my not-so-clean shave but yet sporting a damn handsome smile on a cute face )
2. A zinc or ink or some not so branded and expensive bag for school purpose. My current silver sling zinc bag is giving way liao. Preferably a big bag. cos zinc bags are usually small. I dont mind a big one ( in that sense ) comparable size to my current one. And nice enought to be brought out in home clothes and Sch Uni. Can get it at bugis street? At good bargain? below 40 for sure. Sling or back pack kinds are okay with me. as long as its cool and meant for school purpose.
3. Skinny cut JEANS! waist size is 28-30!!! This will be abit ex though. I dont mind any jeans from far east. heh. i was dreaming only...
4. Ankle socks! The kinds that is so short it stops at below ur ankle kind. Thoes type people think its for girls kind. Usually found at some push carts inside Bugis junction. The kinds me and Shuhui likes to wear. I have a white and pink pair. White one's gone missing. Any colour is cool with me. Ostentious colours will not be bought at your own risk. But rather at mine for your own viewing pleasure. So its really up to my guts to wear whatever loud colours you can find and get for me. I promise i'll wear.. =D
5. pencil case.. wallet.. tshirts.. i think they are okay gifts but i dont think i really need them now.. But if you find a cool wallet at the Wallet Shop something by Stranger products will still be cool with me. But its quite ex tho. 50? Stranger stuffs are ex. But if u really get me that.. i'll stop using my current brown billabong one immediately. pls no myuk wallets for me. unless it looks damn cool...
soccer today at adrians place was cool. way cool. plaed at some fenced up pitch. some reactangular foot ball field. divied into three. so there are 3 pitches within that reactangular field. green and high fences around the place. the entrance is at the bustop there. third stop of bus 27 from hougang interchange. no need to book. nice goal post. like street soccer type. but the pitch is a big bigger and has no walls la.
adrian, his bro, his two friends from tp one of them called jiajun, weng inn, yongkai and me. IMBA TEAM i tell u. ok maybe not imba but its imba cos im in it. im serious. i reach there late like. 3plus. tho i told them i'll reach at 2.45. lol. anw. the bus journey there was lonely. and.. not used to. since there was an absence of a presence. anyway. they called me at like. 1.50pm and i was like. ok cool. take my mind of things and to chill and to get back my leg muscle. my leg muscle is shrinking u know? my sec2 class photo shows two bulging muscles at my calves. den recently one day i looked down. and i saw two skinny sticks. im utterly shock. i use to haf muscles like thoes of eepin on my feet. i swear. now its shrunk. must be due to the lack of training and the lack of leg exercises. badminton did demand alot of footwork and leg mucles from me having to jump and all. anyway i want to back my leg muscles. and recalling i had a hard time getting out of bed becos of my nerve wrecking brainstorming session i had while i was half concsious on my bed, i figured it would be cool to chill with some dudes like wenginn. so off i went. alone on this bus ride. at the hougaang interchange. at the bus 27 berth. so near to the seats outside the toilet whr i know far too well...
went there. saw them. asked them how was it there. they told me they got thrashed. harder and worse tthan the one at marina bay. i was like. okay. it started to scare me. i checked out the opponents. they were tall and big like aged 18-21. like in army kind. and seemed a big ah beng-ish. considering ah bengs dun play soccer. so ok heck. we started the game. nice and smooth sailing. they attacked well.. and we defended well. of cos with adrian holding the defense tgr. there were times of brilliance in our attackin when i had chances infront of the goal. only to see it being blocked by the keeper. ok fine darren. shot off targets is more than shot on target. u gotta improve. den suddenly..
i broke the deadlock.
AR HUH. darren is on fire. wenginn released me from the right. i caught the ball as i ran towards the centre and infront of the goal. and fired a weak shot with my right leg. i rmb i was only hoping for the best and that the keeper wouldnt save or block it. only to be caught by surprise when i heard the ball hit the back of the goal post. it aint a net. it was a metal net. CHIANG. yay its a goal! i didnt expect much seriously when i released that shot for it was weak and from the previous encounters infront of goal with that goalkeeping. i thought he would have saved it easily. heh. maybe my presence and commanding aura infont of him was too overwhelming this time. hehe. anyway. i scored the first goal.
usual cocky darren. became really tired and exhasuted, him being lousy and having low stamina after some running.. i sat back to defend and decided to slack.. i dont rmb the exact details and sequence of events. except that i became goal keep for one short stint becus i was really tired from the running. heh. anyway i kept my clean sheet and did some tyco saves. it was really tyco. just happened to lift my knee and the shot just happened to come in tt direction. so it looked like a really cool save and everyone was impressed. i rmb yongkai or adrian going.. " wahhhh darren." as i went off to pick the ball which flew off after hittin my knee. heh. darren is potential keeper. anw after i sub'ed out again. i dunno what happened. but two goals was scored against us.
the first goal came becos we were too up front and was too slow in coming back to defend when they counter attacked. leaving behind only adrian n e keeper to defend the goal and it was 4v2. so naturally they scored. adrian was rili frustrated at that time becos of there wasnt any defense. i am guilty of it since i seldom run back to defend and prefer to slack infront. the next goal came subsequently it was a stupid goal since wenginn was the goalkeeper and i could tell he was really tired. cos i was alr tired when i scored the first goal. so i became goalkee to slack. and when i was goalkeeper. i kept distributing the goal kicks to weng inn as i trusted him more. i wanted him to have the ball. rather den i pass the ball to someone up front and for them to lose the ball and it becomes an attacking opportunity for them which means im in trouble. so i would always pass to wenginn for him to start the attack. this made him tired as he had to constantly playmake after i pass the ball to him from goal kick. in short. i made him tired.
so he wanted to slack and it was his turn to be keeper while i played upfront. this happened after the opponents scored their first goal. so the second goal came. with wenginn a tired and slack-ish goalkeeper was infront of goal. he hardly bat an eyelid or made an attempt to save the second goal score b the opponents. heh.
so ok fine. 2-1 down. i was really tired and i was thinking it was a goner alr. and i kept thinking of the score line. from 0-0. i made it 1-0. den suddenly its 1-1. becos of poor defending. and the 4v2 thingy. so i cant blame anyone for it. den at 1-1 it seemed like it was at 0-0 again since it was again a tie. so i tot well its okay. the game has just restarted itself. we're back to square one. den wenginn , in a sense, opened the goal post for them to score hence making it 2-1. and den the pressure dawned upon me. upon a tired me. tt suddenly its up to me to tie the game. or the just lose the game completely cos once they score anmother goal to make it 3-1, the game is effectively over. so it was either i save some chanecs for the team by scoring another goal to tie the game. or to either defend and hope they dont make it 3-1. me being tired and all. forced myself into proper game play. i started to play properly tackling whenever nesscessry and running and chiong'in for the ball whenever there;s an attaack. and guess what. my efforts paid off.
there was a long lob from their keeper and adrian was up to defend and to head the ball away from the striker. he did it nicely and the ball was headed back up front for me. becos of the long and high lob from the keeper, half the opponents team were alr on ourside of the field. hence adrian;s head on the ball left me quite empty and free to attack. that header released the beast in me. the ball flew over me. bounced in front of me once. and came up a very small distance again. by this time i was near the post and i just swpt the ball in mid air few inches of the ground into the post. woah. superb first touch scoring. i was awed at myself. 2-2. well done.
by that time. the game is up alr. but they insisted on playin more. so we played awhile longer b4 going off. i gave yk and wenginn a tour around hg mall for abt45 mins. hoping only to see someone i know at hg mall.
Lyrics to the song on my blog. Sums up how i feel now.
http://www.angelfire.com/in4/hits/whathurtsthemost.html">daniel
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